Overheard at the Death Star: Are all dance parties gay? If it’s Disco Music.... then the answer is Yes

Not too much has happened today… Just the typical sounds and dialogue of the office… Which is what makes me truly embrace my job. And my co-workers.

I guess what I’m saying is…. I’m just going to think out loud for the next paragraph or two… if you are bored and don’t want to read it…I won’t be offended… but I doubt you have anything more worthwhile in your life at the moment if you are reading this clusterfuck of ideas in the first place.

We have this old computer that takes up space with us in music video…. It’s nice. It’s the guest computer, interns and PA’s use it when they stop by to say "HEY" or "Give me a fake run so I can go have sex with my significant other" or "Hey, Can I borrow $30 to buy illegal substances" or "If you order take-out food without me, I’m going to shit on your desk later… seriously…because if I eat lunch here on bbq Fridays..I can’t control where I shit". Like I said, it’s nice… Daft$tar and I appreciate it. But the thing is that the computer is possessed. It has these internal speakers are NOBODY can shut off…. So an innocent ’user’ will be browsing (and by browsing I mean stalking) a so-called ’friend’s’ myspace page when all of a sudden that person’s myspace profile song just starts BLASTING (don’t you HATE those profiles with automatic tunes!!!??).

What I’m getting at, is this happened today while Daft$tar was on a very important conference call. Pippin was checking out some girl (and by girl I mean guy) who "just won’t give him the time of day" when all of a sudden… bugles and trumpets and horns of all kinds start screeching at record level decibels…. Straight out of the mystery speakers. I believe the music was referred to as "Mazatlan Club Scene".

At this point in time I was on the verge of leaving a message for a freelance employee…. Who later informed me that " What the Fuck!?? It sounded like you were calling from Spring Break in Tijuana". I’m so unprofessional… Daft$tar, who doesn’t like bugles and trumpets…..ripped off his headset…. Stomped over to Pippin’s satanic computer station and started ripping cords out of the wall…while Pippin fought to scramble out of Daft$tar’s path of wrath.

And speaking of being unprofessional… I can’t help but wonder when I will receive my first sexual harassment subpoena. There is a particular employee who shall remain nameless…. But is referred to as ’walking sex’ especially as we are about to call him… I wonder to myself….how many times can I daydream about what it’s like to …..ermmm you know….. before I have a Freudian slip while leaving a message…

Fuck remaining nameless…. Let’s just call him "Walking Sex"

Oh and if this offends you…..please…. I haven’t even gotten to the character who shall be referred to as "Prison Fantasy"….